Hello there, Madame Woo here and welcome to Faithfully Madame. I hope you all are living well in this current climate. Be safe and cautious, take this and your life seriously. I have been wanting to tackle this topic for you all for some time now. Society has been pushing the boundaries of sexuality since the 70s, let us thank Madonna for that. Originally this idea came from a pop culture hot topic involving Pastor Troy discussing his views openly on the subject of the LGBTQ community. I wanted to discuss the groups’ current influence on the media and facing concerns about your child’s sexual orientation. How to not push our own agendas on our child? How to allow them to grow in love and faith in their own hearts and minds?
Let’s start with the definition of sexuality. Sexuality is the capacity for sexual feelings, a person’s sexual orientation or preference, and sexual activity. I believe that the only one of these things under my control is the capacity for sexual feelings. It is my job as a parent to grow that capacity with knowledge. That knowledge will create ample room for the discovery of their orientation through activity. This exploration is fundamental in setting standards and boundaries that will affect all different kinds of relationships that my child will encounter. Standards and boundaries are not something I feel you can impose upon your child, they will step out of them or restrict them upon their own discovery. This goes back to previous conversations we have had about allowing our creations to think for themselves and come to their own conclusions. You can not smother self-discovery.
I personally have put a lot of thought into this part of my job as a parent. That is usually the case with most parents involving things where they feel the ball was dropped in their own childhood. I am very confident in my approach and I stand by it regardless of what others may think. It was not too long ago that I was a child and I remember fondly the discovery of my body and sexuality. I remember every encounter that I ever had down to the very last detail. I remember that there was no one there to guide me through the ins and outs. I learned mostly from other children, things that I heard people say, and late-night Cinemax. I was misinformed on a lot of things. I keep telling you all that you need to be hip with what is going on. Do not be one of those parents who grows up and forgets that they were once a child. Or raises their child in their time instead of under the present conditions.
My opinion is that children are going to learn things regardless of whether you teach them or not. The fact is you are not the only source of information for them and digital content is more viable and more accessible than ever. Attempting to shelter your children from certain situations will only go so far. We have to prepare our children, not for the world, we wished we lived in but the world that actually exists. As well as when it comes to the LGBTQ community. We must sit down, introduce the information, and set the foundation of knowledge that we want our child to have on the subject. I know people who are deathly afraid of the idea of their child being anything but straight. They are mad at the world for imposing these ideas, through entertainment, upon their children. Instead of arming their child with the knowledge to be impartial.
Our movement is evolving. The movement to liberate our sexuality as a human right, that’s an ongoing struggle.
To be honest, I am happy it is all out in the open, it has existed since mankind. This lifestyle has been hidden and taboo for far too long. When it came to the things that Pastor Troy addressed, I semi agreed with him. Just speaking for my culture and background personally I believe that the African American community can not afford the tax that comes along with the influence of the LGBTQ community. A lot of factors come into play such as the Bisexual aspect which okays an individual’s sex life to involve both the male and female gender, this is not okay for only health reasons of course. In our community, as is with most communities, there is a shortage of men to the ratio of women. Which makes it more difficult to build solid family structures. And yes, I know that society is beginning to breakdown the traditional look of the family structure. However, with our sexual health and family structures already in crisis as well being attacked by other angles. A lot of people in our community feel that we must make sure we are protecting our younger generation from the message that being apart of the LGBTQ community is the way to go. It is a path. There is no wrong or right path.
If you would like to take a look at the interview by The Morning Hustle, go right ahead I found it very informative. Now although these views are very controversial in this very liberal society, I must stand by the facts. That being said Pastor Troy presented nothing to the question of what he would do if one of his children found themselves choosing to follow that path. He claimed that it was impossible that he controls his household and is able to manifest any reality he chooses over his family. By all means, Pastor Troy, believe but I am not an absolute kind of chick. And Yes, I said choose because it is indeed a choice. I know people who have dabbled and found it not for them. I have had thoughts myself and decided that it was not something I was even comfortable exploring. We are born free, it is this life that has given us so much choice that it has burdened us with it. We are complex creatures and every day we are developing layers. Like I said this has been around since the dawn of time. I believe it is our right to make our own decisions and there is no right or wrong way to live. It is not my job to force anyone in this world down a path they do not choose for themselves, including my children.
Hypothetically speaking if one of my children decided to join the LGBTQ community then I would hope it would be minus the T. I need a little bit more time to come around to that idea as it seems more mental than sexual to me. Although falling in love is purely subjective, it is also a gift no matter what it brings. I value love in all shapes and forms. I could not nor would not pass judgment on anyone for their choice to love who they love, including themselves. Whatever you choose to do upon this planet is between you and God, far be it for me to judge. I would love to talk about it though, hear their thoughts about how they feel. I would not encourage it though. I would have to let them explore it for themselves and hope that whatever they decide they are happy with it and can live with it.
Children have had to leave their homes of comfort, have fall down rabbit holes, and never heard from again. Ashamed to come home or tell their families. Children have experienced sexual, psychological, and physical trauma and abuse for the sake of stopping them from feeling the way that they feel. These people should not have to live in some forgotten dark corner of the world. They should be able to join us in harmony and be respected as human beings. Just as I desire to see people who look like me in entertainment. Stories that resonate with the things I am going through with people who represent my likeness. Then I can definitely sympathize with that construct for anyone else. Furthermore, I will raise my child up in the way that I wish for them to go and hope that they do not part from it. Those are my opinions on the subject. I want to be honest with you all. It is the best policy after all.
I think we won’t be able to understand the operations of transphobia, homophobia if we don’t understand how certain kinds of links are forged between gender and sexuality in the minds of those who want masculinity to be absolutely separate from femininity and heterosexuality to be absolutely separate from homosexuality.
This quote involves blurring the lines. Lending the idea that seemingly opposite sexualities are synonymous with one another. Playing with the idea that since your gender dictates your sexuality according to tradition that how far fetched is it to believe that sexuality can dictate gender. We are unearthing these new ideas as I type. Balance tends to always come down to some sort of contradiction. The argument is very valid in this regard. I remember, on an episode of Sex in the City, Samantha, the more sexually fluid of the group, made a prediction on the future of sexuality being pansexual. It seems to be leaning in that direction in my opinion. It seems to me feminism has open the door to society questioning the traditional gender roles. Once you open the door you do not get to regulate what comes through it, in other words, the floodgates have opened. Let us try to keep an open mind and an open heart to our children. Being sexually fluid is not an abomination. Peace is love, Progressive Madame Woo.